But here is the document, written in
the same style in which it was spoken. Read it; you have a rich
treat in store."
I took the pamphlet, not a little amused at his description of Mr.
C - -, for whom I felt an uncharitable dislike.
"And how did you contrive to entertain yourself, Mr. Wilson, during
his long address?"
"By thinking how many fools were collected together, to listen to
one greater than the rest. By the way, Moodie, did you notice
farmer Flitch?"
"No; where did he sit?"
"At the foot of the table. You must have seen him, he was too big
to be overlooked. What a delightful squint he had! What a ridiculous
likeness there was between him and the roast pig he was carving!
I was wondering all dinner-time how that man contrived to cut up
that pig; for one eye was fixed upon the ceiling, and the other
leering very affectionately at me. It was very droll; was it not?"
"And what do you intend doing with yourself when you arrive in
Canada?" said I.
"Find out some large hollow tree, and live like Bruin in winter by
sucking my paws. In the summer there will be plenty of mast and
acorns to satisfy the wants of an abstemious fellow."
"But, joking apart, my dear fellow," said my husband, anxious to
induce him to abandon a scheme so hopeless, "do you think that you
are at all qualified for a life of toil and hardship?"
"Are you?" returned Tom, raising his large, bushy, black eyebrows
to the top of his forehead, and fixing his leaden eyes steadfastly
upon his interrogator, with an air of such absurd gravity that we
burst into a hearty laugh.
"Now what do you laugh for? I am sure I asked you a very serious
question."
"But your method of putting it is so unusual that you must excuse
us for laughing."
"I don't want you to weep," said Tom; "but as to our
qualifications, Moodie, I think them pretty equal. I know you think
otherwise, but I will explain. Let me see; what was I going to
say? - ah, I have it! You go with the intention of clearing land,
and working for yourself, and doing a great deal. I have tried
that before in New South Wales, and I know that it won't answer.
Gentlemen can't work like labourers, and if they could, they
won't - it is not in them, and that you will find out. You expect,
by going to Canada, to make your fortune, or at least secure a
comfortable independence. I anticipate no such results; yet I mean
to go, partly out of a whim, partly to satisfy my curiosity whether
it is a better country than New South Wales; and lastly, in the
hope of bettering my condition in a small way, which at present is
so bad that it can scarcely be worse.
