And
though she was twice trimed at Hamton, yet now shee is open and lekie as
a seine; and ther was a borde, a man might have puld of with his fingers,
2 foote longe, wher ye water came in as at a mole hole. We lay at Hamton
7. days, in fair weather, waiting for her, and now we lye hear waiting
for her in as faire a wind as can blowe, and so have done these 4. days,
and are like to lye 4. more, and by yt time ye wind will happily turne as
it did at Hamton. Our victualls will be halfe eaten up, I thinke, before
we goe from the coaste of England, and if our viage last longe, we shall
not have a months victialls when we come in ye countrie. Near 700li.
hath bene bestowed at Hamton upon what I know not. Mr. Martin saith he
neither can nor will give any accounte of it, and if he be called upon
for accounts he crieth out of unthankfulness for his paines & care, that
we are susspitious of him, and flings away, and will end nothing. Also
he so insulteh over our poore people with shuch scorne and contempte, as
if they were not good enough to wipe his shoes. It would break your hart
to see his dealing, and ye mourning of our people. They complaine to me,
& alass! I can doe nothing for them; if I speake to him, he flies in my
face, as mutinous, and saith no complaints shall be heard or received but
by him selfe, and saith they are forwarde, & waspish, discontented
people, & I doe ill to hear them. Ther are others yt would lose all they
have put in, or make satisfaction for what they have had, that they might
departe; but he will not hear them, nor suffer them to goe ashore, least
they should rune away. The sailors also are so offended at his ignorante
bouldnes, in medling & controuling in things he knows not what belongs
too, as yt some threaten to misscheefe him, others say they will leave ye
shipe & goe their way. But at ye best this cometh of it, yt he maks him
selfe a scorne & laughing stock unto them. As for Mr. Weston, excepte
grace doe greatly swaye with him, he will hate us ten times more then
ever he loved us, for not confirming ye conditions. But now, since some
pinches have taken them, they begine to reveile ye trueth, and say Mr.
Robinson was in ye falte who charged them never to consente to those
conditions, nor chuse me into office, but indeede apointed them to chose
them they did chose. But he and they will rue too late, they may now
see, & all be ashamed when it is too late, that they were so ignorante,
yea, & so inordinate in their courses. I am sure as they were resolved
not to seale those conditions, I was not so resolute at Hamton to have
left ye whole bussines, excepte they would seale them, and better ye
vioage to have bene broken of then, then to have brought such miserie to
our selves, dishonour to God, & detrimente to our loving freinds, as now
it is like to doe. 4. or 5. of ye cheefe of them which came from Leyden,
came resolved never to goe on those conditions. And Mr. Martine, he said
he never received no money on those conditions, he was not beholden to ye
marchants, for a pine [pennie], they were bloudsuckers, & I know not
what. Simple man, he indeed never made any conditions wth the marchants,
nor ever spake with them.
But did all that money flie to Hamton, or was it his owne? Who will goe
lay out money so rashly & lavishly as he did, and never know how he comes
by it, or on what conditions? I tould him of ye alteration longe
agoe, & he was contente; but now he dominires, & said I had betrayed them
into ye hands of slaves; he is not beholden to them, he can set out 2
ships him selfe to a viage. When, good man? He hath but 50li. in, & if
he should give up his accounts he would not have a penie left him,
- ["This was found true afterwards.] W[illiam] B"[radford]] - as I
am persuaded, &c. Freind, if ever we make a plantation, God works a
mirakle; especially considering how scante we shall be of victualls, and
most of all ununited amongst our selves, & devoyd of good tutors and
regimente. Violence will break all. Wher is ye meek & humble spirite of
Moyses? & of Nehemiah who reedified ye wals of Jerusalem, and ye state of
Israell? Is not ye sound of Rehoboams braggs daly hear amongst us? Have
not ye philosophers and all wise men observed yt, even in setled comone
welths, violente governours bring either them selves, or people, or
boath, to ruine; how much more in ye raising of comone wealths, when ye
mortar is yet scarce tempered yt should bind ye wales [walls]. If I
should write to you of all things which promiscuously forerune our ruine,
I should over charge my weake head and greeve your tender hart; only
this, I pray you prepare for evill tidings of us every day. But pray for
us instantly, it may be ye Lord will be yet entreated one way or other to
make for us. I see not in reason how we shall escape even ye gasping of
hunger starved persons; but God can doe much, & his will be done. It is
better for me to dye, then now for me to bear it, which I doe daly, &
expect it howerly; haveing received ye sentance of death, both within me
& with out me. Poore William Ring & my selfe doe strive who shall be
meate first for ye fishes; but we looke for a glorious resurrection,
knowing Christ Jesus after ye flesh no more, but looking unto ye joye yt
is before us, we will endure all these things and accounte them light in
comparison of ye joye we hope for.
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