He was now so weak as to be scarcely able to
sit up at the fireside and complained that the least breeze of wind
seemed to blow through his frame. He also suffered much from cold during
the night. We lay close to each other but the heat of the body was no
longer sufficient to thaw the frozen rime formed by our breaths on the
blankets that covered him.
At this period we avoided as much as possible conversing upon the
hopelessness of our situation and generally endeavoured to lead the
conversation towards our future prospects in life. The fact is that with
the decay of our strength our minds decayed, and we were no longer able
to bear the contemplation of the horrors that surrounded us. Each of us,
if I may be allowed to judge from my own case, excused himself from so
doing by a desire of not shocking the feelings of others, for we were
sensible of one another's weakness of intellect though blind to our own.
Yet we were calm and resigned to our fate, not a murmur escaped us, and
we were punctual and fervent in our addresses to the Supreme Being.
On the 19th Michel refused to hunt or even to assist in carrying a log of
wood to the fire which was too heavy for Hepburn's strength and mine. Mr.
Hood endeavoured to point out to him the necessity and duty of exertion,
and the cruelty of his quitting us without leaving something for our
support, but the discourse, far from producing any beneficial effect,
seemed only to excite his anger and, amongst other expressions, he made
use of the following remarkable one: "It is no use hunting, there are no
animals, you had better kill and eat me." At length however he went out
but returned very soon with a report that he had seen three deer which he
was unable to follow from having wet his foot in a small stream of water
thinly covered with ice and being consequently obliged to come to the
fire. The day was rather mild and Hepburn and I gathered a large
kettleful of tripe de roche; Michel slept in the tent this night.
Sunday, October 20.
In the morning we again urged Michel to go a-hunting that he might if
possible leave us some provision, tomorrow being the day appointed for
his quitting us, but he showed great unwillingness to go out and lingered
about the fire under the pretence of cleaning his gun. After we had read
the morning service I went about noon to gather some tripe de roche,
leaving Mr. Hood sitting before the tent at the fireside arguing with
Michel; Hepburn was employed cutting down a tree at a short distance from
the tent, being desirous of accumulating a quantity of firewood before he
left us.
