I Felt As One Involved In A
Moral Disaster; Working In Spite Of Reason, My Brain Regarded The
Matter From Many Points Of View, And Found No Shadow Of Solace.
The
sense that so short a distance separated me from the place I desired
to see, added exasperation to my distress.
Half-delirious, I at
times seemed to be in a boat, tossing on wild waters, the Column
visible afar, but only when I strained my eyes to discover it. In a
description of the approach by land, I had read of a great precipice
which had to be skirted, and this, too, haunted me with its terrors:
I found myself toiling on a perilous road, which all at once
crumbled into fearful depths just before me. A violent shivering fit
roused me from this gloomy dreaming, and I soon after fell into a
visionary state which, whilst it lasted, gave me such placid
happiness as I have never known when in my perfect mind. Lying still
and calm, and perfectly awake, I watched a succession of wonderful
pictures. First of all I saw great vases, rich with ornament and
figures; then sepulchral marbles, carved more exquisitely than the
most beautiful I had ever known. The vision grew in extent, in
multiplicity of detail; presently I was regarding scenes of ancient
life - thronged streets, processions triumphal or religious, halls
of feasting, fields of battle. What most impressed me at the time
was the marvellously bright yet delicate colouring of everything I
saw.
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