Si Quis Germania Aut Alterius Nationes Vrbes Et Pagos Omnes Peragret, Et Scelera Ac Mores Pessimos, Furta, Homicidia, Parricidia, Scortationes,

Adulteria, incestus luxuriem, rapinas et reliquas impietates et obscoenitates in vnum coactas, omnibus Germanis, aut alioqui alteri cuiuis toti nationi

Communes esse asserat, atque hac omnia insigniter mentiendo, exaggeret, isne optima rei studiosus habebitur?

Sed quid mirum, licet verbero, et, vt proprie notem, porcus impurus, iste, inquam, Rhythmista, naturam et ingenium suum eiusmodi loidoria prodiderit?

Notum est enim porcos, cum hortos amanissimos intrarint, nec lilium nec rosas aut flores alioqui pulcherrimos et suauissimos decerpere: Sed rostro in coenum prono, quicquid est luti et stercoris volutare, vertere et inuertere, donec impurissima, hoc est, suo genio apprime congruentia eruant, vbi demum solida voluptate pascuntur.

Ad istum igitur modum hic porcus Rythmista, optima, et qua in nostra Repub. laudabilia esse possunt, sicco pede praterit, pessima quaque atque ea, vel a nullo, vel admodum paucis designata, hoc est, sua natura, et ingenio aptissima, vt se esse, qui dicitur, re ipsa probaret, corrasit; vnde posthac porci nomen ex moribus et ingenio ipsius factum, sortitor.

The same in English.

THE FOURTEENTH SECTION.

[Sidenote: The 4. 5. 6. & 7. reproches.] Fourthly, he sayth that in bankets none of the ghests vse to rise from the table: but that the good wife of the house reacheth to euery one a chamber pot, so oft as need requireth. Moreouer, he noteth much vnmanerliness of eating and drinking at bankets.

Fiftly, he obiecteth customes of lying in bed, and of dining: namely that ten persons, more or lesse, men and women be altogether in the same bed, and that they eat their meat lying in bed: and that in the meane time they do nothing but play at dice or at tables.

Sixtly, he reporteth that they wash their hands or their faces in pisse.

Seuenthly, he despightfully abaseth our solemnizings of marriages, spousals, birth-dayes, and our customes at burials.

These, and a number of such like reproches hath this impure slanderer, spued foorth against an innocent nation, yea and that nation which hath deserued right well of him and his countrimen. Which are of the same kind with these, in so much that we altogether disdeigne to make answere vnto them. For, that we may graunt (which notwithstanding we will in no case yeelde vnto) that this worthy Germane notarie obserued some such matter among base companions, and the very of-scouring of the common people, with whom he was much more conuersant than with good and honest persons (for he had liued, as his rimes testifie, somewhat long vpon the coast of Island, whither a confused rout of the meanest common people, in fishing time do yerely resort, who being naught aswell through their owne leudnesse, as by the wicked behauiour of outlandish mariners, often times doe leade a badde and dishonest life) notwithstanding we are in this place more manifestly wronged through the knauery of this one varlet, and desperate sycophant by his defaming of the whole nation (as others also vsually do) then that it should neede any refutation at all. Of which thing strangers themselues, who are not a little conuersant in our Iland, may be most sufficient witnesses.

I could also gather together many such filthy, vnmannerly, and baudie fashions noted by others euen in his own countrey. But I detest this dogged eloquence, neither take I any pleasure to be witty in the disgracing of others: and yet I will not shew my selfe such a milke-soppe as to be daunted with light words. Onely, let all honest and good men consider, what disposition it argueth, for one to obiect against a whole nation certaine misdemeanours committed by some one or other particular man. If any man should trauell thorowout all the cities and townes of Germanie or any other nation, and heaping together the offences, and most leud maners, the robberies, manslaughters, murthers, whoredomes, adulteries, incests, riots, extortions, and other prophane, and filthy actes, should affirme them to be common to all Germans, or otherwise to any other whole nation, and should exaggerate all these things with notorious lies, is he to be accounted one that spends his time in a good argument? But what maruaile is it, though a varlet, and, that I may giue him his true title, a filthy hogge, that imer (I say) hath bewrayed his nature and disposition in reproches? For it is well knowen that swine, when they enter into most pleasant gardens, do not plucke lilies or roses, or any other most beautifull aud sweet flowers; but thrusting their snouts into the ground, doe tumble and tosse vp and downe whatsoeuer durt and dung they can finde, vntill they haue rooted vp most vncleane things, namely such as are best agreeable to their nature, wherewith they greedily glut themselues: Euen so this hoggish Rimer lightly passeth ouer the best and most commendable things of our Common wealth, but as for the woorst, and those which haue been committed by none, or by very few, namely, such things as best fit his humour and disposition (that he might indeed show himselfe to be the same which we haue termed him) those things (I say) hath he scraped vp together: whereupon hereafter by my consent, for his maners and disposition let him enioy the name of a swine.

SECTIO DECIMAQUINTA.

[Sidenote: 9. Conuitium.] Nonum conuicium hic recensebimus, quod a victu, ac pracipue cibo potu Islandorum maledicus ille porcus, non vno aut paucis verbis, sed prolixa inuectiua petiuit: Nempe quod cibis vtantur vetustis, et insulsis, idque sine panis vsu: Tum etiam quod varia et incognita extraneis piscium genera illis sint esui, et aquam ac serum lactis in potum misceant. Qua omnia venenatus hic pasquillus diserta contumelia, et ingeniosa calumnia, pulchre amplificauit.

Caterum etsi ilium prolixiore responsione non dignemur: tamen propter alios, qui hodie hanc rem partim mirantur, partim haud leuiter nostra genti obijciunt, pauca hoc loco addenda videbantur.

Primum igitur totam hanc gentem bipartito secabimus: In mendicos, et hos qui et se et cum alijs etiam mendicos alunt.

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