Foot of the so earnestly wished-for hill with the
high white house on its summit, when, just as I was going to ascend
it, and was already pleasing myself in the idea with the prospect
from the white house, behold I read these words on a board: "Take
care! there are steel traps and spring guns here."
All my labour was lost, and I now went round to the other hill; but
here were also steel traps and spring gnus, though probably never
intended to annoy such a wanderer as myself, who wished only to
enjoy the fine morning air from this eminence.
Thus disappointed in my hopes, I returned to Windsor, much in the
same temper and manner as I had yesterday morning from Richmond
Hill; where my wishes had also been frustrated.
When I got to my inn, I received from the ill-tempered maid, who
seemed to have been stationed there on purpose to plague and vex me,
the polite welcome, that on no account should I sleep another night
there. Luckily, that was not my intention. I now write to you in
the coffee room, where two Germans are talking together, who
certainly little suspect how well I understand them; if I were to
make myself known to them, as a German, most probably, even these
fellows would not speak to me, because I travel on foot. I fancy
they are Hanoverians! The weather is so fine that, notwithstanding
the inconveniences I have hitherto experienced on this account, I
think I shall continue my journey in the same manner.
CHAPTER X.
Oxford, June 25.
To what various, singular, and unaccountable fatalities and
adventures are not foot-travellers exposed, in this land of
carriages and horses! But, I will begin my relation in form and
order.
In Windsor, I was obliged to pay for an old fowl I had for supper,
for a bedroom which I procured with some difficulty, and not without
murmurs, and in which, to complete my misadventures, I was disturbed
by a drunken fellow; and for a couple of dishes of tea, nine
shillings, of which the fowl alone was charged six shillings.
As I was going away the waiter, who had served me with so very ill a
grace, placed himself on the stairs and said, "Pray remember the
waiter." I gave him three halfpence, on which he saluted me with
the heartiest "G-d d-n you, sir!" I had ever heard. At the door
stood the cross maid, who also accosted me with, "Pray remember the
chambermaid." "Yes, yes," said I, "I shall long remember your most
ill-mannered behaviour and shameful incivility;" and so I gave her
nothing. I hope she was stung and nettled at my reproof; however,
she strove to stifle her anger by a contemptuous, loud, hoarse
laugh. Thus, as I left Windsor, I was literally followed by abuses
and curses.
