- If This Won't Turn Out Something, - Another Will; - No Matter, -
'tis An Assay Upon Human Nature - I Get My Labour For My Pains, -
'tis Enough; - The Pleasure Of The Experiment Has Kept My Senses And
The Best Part Of My Blood Awake, And Laid The Gross To Sleep.
I pity the man who can travel from Dan to Beersheba, and cry, 'Tis
all barren; - and so it is:
And so is all the world to him who will
not cultivate the fruits it offers. I declare, said I, clapping my
hands cheerily together, that were I in a desert, I would find out
wherewith in it to call forth my affections: - if I could not do
better, I would fasten them upon some sweet myrtle, or seek some
melancholy cypress to connect myself to; - I would court their
shade, and greet them kindly for their protection. - I would cut my
name upon them, and swear they were the loveliest trees throughout
the desert: if their leaves wither'd, I would teach myself to
mourn; and, when they rejoiced, I would rejoice along with them.
The learned Smelfungus travelled from Boulogne to Paris, - from
Paris to Rome, - and so on; - but he set out with the spleen and
jaundice, and every object he pass'd by was discoloured or
distorted. - He wrote an account of them, but 'twas nothing but the
account of his miserable feelings.
I met Smelfungus in the grand portico of the Pantheon: - he was
just coming out of it.
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