I Set The Tea To Draw, And
Then Dashed To The Door, Bowed Appetisingly To The Visitors, Showed
Them To
The tables with a winning smile (which was to be extra),
seated the children maternally on the steps and laid
Napkins before
them, dashed back to the kitchen, cut the thin bread-and-butter, and
brought it with the marmalade, asked my customers if they desired
cream, and told them it was extra, went back and brought a tray with
tea, boiling water, milk, and cream. Lowering my voice to an
English sweetness, and dropping a few h's ostentatiously as I
answered questions, I poured five cups of tea, and four mugs for the
children, and cut more bread-and-butter, for they were all eating
like wolves. They praised the butter. I told them it was a
specialty of the house. They requested muffins. With a smile of
heavenly sweetness tinged with regret, I replied that Saturday was
our muffin day; Saturday, muffins; Tuesday, crumpets; Thursday,
scones; and Friday, tea-cakes. This inspiration sprang into being
full grown, like Pallas from the brain of Zeus. While they were
regretting that they had come on a plain bread-and-butter day, I
retired to the kitchen and made out a bill for presentation to the
oldest man of the party.
Feeling five and threepence to be an absurdly small charge for five
adult and four infant teas, I destroyed this immediately, and made
out another, putting each item fourpence more, and the bread-and-
butter at one-and-six.
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