The
Denomination Of This Festival Is Also That Of The Glowing And
Mysterious Feeling Which Has Pierced My Entire Life As With A
Sacred Wound.
Yes, "Jesus Christ on the Cross," a yearning longing after the
Cross and the raising of the Cross, - this
Was ever my true inner
calling; I have felt it in my innermost heart ever since my
seventeenth year, in which I implored with humility and tears
that I might be permitted to enter the Paris Seminary; at that
time I hoped it would be granted to me to live the life of the
saints and perhaps even to die a martyr's death. This, alas! has
not happened - yet, in spite of the transgressions and errors
which I have committed, and for which I feel sincere repentance
and contrition, the holy light of the Cross has never been
entirely withdrawn from me. At times, indeed, the refulgence of
this Divine light has overflowed my entire soul. - I thank God for
this, and shall die with my soul fixed upon the Cross, our
redemption, our highest bliss; and, in acknowledgment of my
belief, I wish before my death to receive the holy sacraments of
the Catholic, Apostolic, and Romish Church, and thereby to attain
the forgiveness and remission of all my sins. Amen.
I thank my mother with reverence and tender love for her
continual proofs of goodness and love. In my youth people called
me a good son; it was certainly no special merit on my part, for
how would it have been possible not to be a good son with so
faithfully self-sacrificing a mother? - Should I die before her,
her blessing will follow me into the grave.
I owe it to my cousin Eduard Liszt (Dr. and Royal County
Councillor of Justice in Vienna) to repeat here my warm and
grateful affection for him, and to thank him for his faithfulness
and staunch friendship. By his worth, his talents, and his
character he does honor to the name I bear, and I pray God for
His blessings on him, his wife, and his children.
Among our Art-comrades of the day there is one name which has
already become glorious, and which will become so ever more and
more - Richard Wagner. His genius has been to me a light which I
have followed - and my friendship for Wagner has always been of
the character of a noble passion. At a certain period (about ten
years ago) I had visions of a new Art-period for Weymar, similar
to that of Carl August, in which Wagner and I should have been
the leading spirits, as Goethe and Schiller were formerly, - but
unfavorable circumstances have brought this dream to nothing.
To my daughter Cosima I bequeath the sketch of Steinle
representing St. Francois de Paul, my patron saint; he is walking
on the waves, his mantle spread beneath his feet, holding in one
hand a red-hot coal, the other raised, either to allay the
tempest or to bless the menaced boatmen, his look turned to
heaven, where, in a glory, shines the redeeming word "Caritas." -
This sketch has always stood on my writing-table.
Enter page number
PreviousNext
Page 223 of 244
Words from 116587 to 117116
of 127569
