This is a sober fact.
These worthies constitute a religious police; and you always know them
by the great white diapers they wear. On week days they are quite as
busy as on Sundays; to the great terror of the inhabitants, going all
over the island, and spying out the wickedness thereof.
Moreover, they are the collectors of fines - levied generally in grass
mats - for obstinate non-attendance upon divine worship, and other
offences amenable to the ecclesiastical judicature of the
missionaries.
Old Bob called these fellows "kannakippers" a corruption, I fancy, of
our word constable.
He bore them a bitter grudge; and one day, drawing near home, and
learning that two of them were just then making a domiciliary visit
at his house, he ran behind a bush; and as they came forth, two green
bread-fruit from a hand unseen took them each between the shoulders.
The sailors in the Calabooza were witnesses to this, as well as
several natives; who, when the intruders were out of sight, applauded
Captain Bob's spirit in no measured terms; the ladies present
vehemently joining in. Indeed, the kannakippers have no greater
enemies than the latter. And no wonder: the impertinent varlets,
popping into their houses at all hours, are forever prying into their
peccadilloes.
Kooloo, who at times was patriotic and pensive, and mourned the evils
under which his country was groaning, frequently inveighed against
the statute which thus authorized an utter stranger to interfere with
domestic arrangements. He himself - quite a ladies' man - had often
been annoyed thereby. He considered the kannakippers a bore.
Beside their confounded inquisitiveness, they add insult to injury, by
making a point of dining out every day at some hut within the limits
of their jurisdiction. As for the gentleman of the house, his meek
endurance of these things is amazing. But "good easy man," there is
nothing for him but to be as hospitable as possible.
These gentry are indefatigable. At the dead of night prowling round
the houses, and in the daytime hunting amorous couples in the groves.
Yet in one instance the chase completely baffled them.
It was thus.
Several weeks previous to our arrival at the island, someone's husband
and another person's wife, having taken a mutual fancy for each
other, went out for a walk. The alarm was raised, and with hue and
cry they were pursued; but nothing was seen of them again until the
lapse of some ninety days; when we were called out from the Calabooza
to behold a great mob inclosing the lovers, and escorting them for
trial to the village.
Their appearance was most singular. The girdle excepted, they were
quite naked; their hair was long, burned yellow at the ends, and
entangled with burrs; and their bodies scratched and scarred in all
directions.
